Week 21: Total lack of willpower

Well, it would figure that the week after I blog about making healthy choices, such as exercising while pregnant, I would have to follow it up with a post about my complete and utter lack of willpower as of late. I’d like to say it was brought about by Thanksgiving, that joyous holiday of belt-loosening meals, or Black Friday, the day where a venti coffee and a slice of pumpkin loaf are practically your ticket in the door … but, alas, I cannot. No, I’ve been wrestling with this willpower issue for weeks now.

It’s the food.

It’s just so good.

I am a planner. I color-code my lesson plans. I determine the most efficient route around town when I’m running errands. I make lists and lists and lists. One of those is a weekly grocery list (divided by areas of the store), which sits in a notebook next to my list of meals for the week. Clearly, I like to plan … and I have good plans when Monday rolls around. I plan for a healthy week of meals.

But then I get hungry.

And that’s a major problem … because this pregnant lady left her willpower in the first trimester.

I don’t do too badly in the mornings. I always eat a healthy breakfast at home before I leave for the day. I’m an oatmeal girl, so I have it for breakfast almost daily (healthy choice No. 1—check!). Then, when my students have a morning special, I eat a low-sugar, high-protein granola bar or some other kind of snack to hold me over until lunch (healthy choice No. 2—check!). I always bring my lunch from home and it often includes the standard peanut butter sandwich, or (if I’m feeling quite spry) I’ll bring bread and make peanut butter toast. Ooh la la! There is always fruit, and often a vegetable, in my lunch as well (healthy choice No. 3—check!).

Sounding pretty decent so far, right?

Sometime in the afternoon, my students may leave for a special … and then the healthy foundation I laid during the morning starts to crumble. Even though I have an apple and a clementine sitting on my desk, I find myself digging through my drawers to find something sweet. Sometimes I’ll find a Hershey’s Kiss. The other day, I found a bag of candy that I had intended to give out to students in the future. Bet you can figure out what happened to that.

No. Willpower.

And then there’s my struggle with restaurants. Tonight, we went shopping for the Christmas family we adopted through church. Since we were running errands, we decided to pick up dinner from Runza. Those of you who live in a city without a Runza have my sincerest condolences. It is incredible. So incredible, if fact, that I can barely even look at the healthy(ish) choices on the menu before settling on a Swiss cheese mushroom burger and frings (that’s a combo of fries and onion rings, and it’s fantastic). I know it’s not healthy. I know I should be making better choices for myself and for my baby. Why, oh why, can’t I help myself?

I tell myself that I have to enjoy these things during my second trimester because, come trimester three, I’m going to have to cut dairy, soy and corn (read: everything good) from my diet. Our daughter had fairly severe MSPI (milk soy protein intolerance), which meant that her body could not process the proteins contained in milk or soy. Because I was nursing, this meant that I couldn’t have said items either. Since Olivia had MSPI, it is likely that Baby No. 2 will have it as well. So I will discontinue enjoying the finer things in life (like cheese) once I enter my third trimester, in order to avoid the nightmare that occurs when an MSPI baby has milk or soy in their system.

Because I won’t be able to have my Swiss cheese mushroom burger in a couple of months … I should I enjoy it now, right? And Chinese food? And Butterfingers? And …

No willpower. Help me!