Week 32: Support system

I know Mother’s Day just passed, and I could be consumed with the reality I am included in the people group being celebrated! After all, I am now a mom, but instead of thinking about “my day,” I am weeks ahead of time thinking about Father’s Day.
I was talking to my mom the other day admitting “it” hadn’t hit me yet that I am having a baby. I told her I feel no stress, no anxiety and no fear. It’s great, but it’s weird! She said (after agreeing it was indeed, weird), “Do you think you feel that way because of your support system?” I immediately realized she is so right. I have such an amazing support system, and the last thing I feel is alone. Ironically, it has allowed me to feel unprepared at times, but also more than capable to figure it out along the way. I can be a real human through this process and ditch the neurotic, superhero bit!
I could give shout outs to many, many people, all included in the term “support system.” However, one person really takes the cake in that category. Maybe it’s my wishful thinking Bellamy will arrive early for Father’s Day, or maybe it’s because our wedding anniversary is in a few days, but I can’t stop thinking (and thanking!) about my rock through it all, Matt.
From day one, Matt has been a servant-hearted, giving partner. We really were kids when we decided to get married, and he quickly developed this amazing commitment and work ethic that has continued to floor me throughout the past few years. I don’t know how he does what he does, and Bellamy will be blessed to grow up watching his example. In my opinion, he is the perfect balance of work and play. From him, she will learn true hustle, opportunity, service, how to stay young and how to be a boss.
I have shared many things about myself while blogging for Pregnancy and Newborn that gives evidence to the types of attributes Bellamy might inherit from me (especially my big mouth and the TMI). Because she is also half of him, allow me to continue to dote on him, as he deserves all the recognition in the world.
I hope she is like her dad in terms of talent. Matt is an amazing musician. He can play so many different instruments, sing, teach and direct music. My favorite thing he plays is the piano, and we plan to teach her as soon as she can sit on the stool next to him. He is very smart and a profound communicator, always speaking peace and easily able to diffuse tension and conflict. He is the person you want around all the time because he brings great energy and intention with him wherever he goes. He has been called “the most interesting person I have ever met” by his peers, and he challenges those around him in terms of having your priorities in line and being a good steward of what you have. He is everything I have come to know as good in life, and he is also so, so good looking—as if there needed to be a cherry on top of that list. I could talk about him all day, but I mainly wanted to shine a little light on how wonderful this little girl is going to be, thanks to her incredible dad. It also wouldn’t hurt if she inherits his great hair, eyebrows and smile, too! She could only be so lucky!
Thanks to Matt and our shared faith in God, I feel I can walk into this little thing called motherhood with my head held high. I can go to sleep every night not fearing what tomorrow will bring for us, because I have been given a true man of character and a true warrior of life circumstance. I don’t dwell on the things we don’t have, but continually meditate on how thankful I am for him and our marriage. I know it may seem weird for some expectant moms to read this, but having this baby only increases my love and affection for him. Instead of feeling more like “mom,” I am more fixated than ever on being his wife. It’s almost as if my life has become more about him and our marriage through the process of being pregnant. I’m not sure I can even elaborate on that thought, so I will leave it at this …
Matt, you continue to be my fondest memory, and my best decision made. I know you would have this baby yourself if you could, so it’s my honor to be a part of any dream you have for your life. If she is even 1/10 like you, I wont be able to get enough! Through your diligence, consistency and perseverance, you established a sense of security I couldn’t pay for during this process. What you give me is truly priceless, and we—both of us girls—will never be able to shower you with enough gratitude. We love you, and happy anniversary, darling!